


Waiting by the  Door

by YohKoBennington



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Drabble, M/M, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-20
Updated: 2014-04-20
Packaged: 2018-01-20 01:45:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 494
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1492159
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/YohKoBennington/pseuds/YohKoBennington
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Only when Lilith was finally dead, when Sam got to see her burn slowly for taking everything from him, he would have it all back.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Waiting by the  Door

**Author's Note:**

> This is just something I found in my flashdrive, and decided to just put it out there because I'm in a deathfic mood, but I've too many things to write already so I'm trying to behave and stick to the program.
> 
> Also, this is not beta'ed. My apologies for any mistakes I didn't catch myself.

Most nights, Sam wouldn't sleep on his own bed. He would be too drunk to even move from the chair, or the sofa he would be currently occupying in some new nameless motel room.

But there were nights that he would spend by the door, knees draw up to his chest, one side of his face pressed to the wood so he could catch Dean’s steps when walking towards the room. One of his hands holding tightly the door knob, ready to yank it open, as the other held on to the amulet now hanging from his neck.

Sam was waiting.

Waiting for Dean to come back. To be behind that door and hear him say  _“What the hell are you doing in the floor, Sammy?_  

To make him get up and put him back to bed, and then lie down next to Sam like when they were little and they had to share beds. Or Sam had a nightmares and he wanted his big brother to hold him and tell him that everything was going to be okay.

Sam would hold him with all his might this time. It’s been so long,  _too long_ , and he would never let Dean go again.

Sam wanted Dean to tell him that all this time he spent alone was just a terrible  _nightmare_. He wanted to hear Dean’s gruff voice making a crude joke. He wanted to hear him laugh, and sing loudly in the car. He wanted to feel Dean's hands over his skin, tracing undefined pattern that only his brother ever knew what they meant. To feel Dean's breath against his neck, when in cold nights he would wrap himself all over Sam. To see him fixing the Impala with the love and devotion that only Dean was able to do. To be able to read Dean's eyes and see all the things his brother would never say to him, but with one look Sam always knew were there. He wanted to taste the reminds of whiskey and cheeseburger on Dean's tongue. Smell the gunpowder, leather, and sweat that was all _Dean_ until his senses became overwhelmed with it. 

He wanted so many things.

He wanted a miracle. He wanted his brother alive.

Those mornings Sam would wake up still laying by the door, body numb from being in the floor all night, and red marks in his palm from the amulet.

But there was no Dean.

Because Dean was in Hell, and he wasn't coming back. Didn’t matter what Sam did or how many demons he killed. Dean was gone, and all Sam had left to live for was revenge. It was the only thing keeping him from putting a bullet through his head so he could be with Dean.

Only when Lilith was finally dead, when Sam got to see her burn slowly for taking everything from him, he would have it all back.

He would soon meet his brother in Hell.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading ♥


End file.
